To Stroller Or Not To Stroller

Rumor has it there are adults in the world who get to leave their homes without a stroller.  I hear it's a magical place where there are no diaper bags, shoes that blink with every step and cars don't even have smashed goldfish crackers in the back seat.

I am skeptical this place exists.  I feel like I visited this land long ago but it's a very vague memory so I'm thinking it was just in a dream.

The stroller is my worst enemy and my best friend these days.  Two years ago it was great.  I could take the kids anywhere because they couldn't even crawl.  A year ago the stroller was pretty good.  The boys were walking short distances and couldn't really complain if I strapped them in the stroller.  Now it's a different story.

Here is the dilemma I face every time I want to go out:

• If I take the stroller Aaron will want to walk but Jeff will want to sit.  Aaron will want to push the stroller and Jeff will inevitably yell, "Noooooo Aaron!"
• If I don't let Aaron push he cries.  On the rare occasion he doesn't cry he will run ahead of me and I can't keep up with him while pushing a stroller on narrow Boston streets.
• If Jeff and Aaron decide that they both want to walk (even though they told me three minutes ago that they wanted the stroller) there is a fight over who gets to push the stroller.  
• If I don't take the stroller then both boys will want to be carried and I cannot carry two 30 lbs boys around for more than a minute or two.  
• If I don't take the stroller and both the boys want to walk Aaron usually runs ahead of me and Jeff loves to dawdle and take time to smell the roses.  I'm stuck in the middle trying to make sure no one is running into the street, picking flowers off of someone's front lawn, playing with a garbage can or having a meltdown because the sun is yellow today and he wants it to be green with orange polka dots.  

It's a no win situation.

If only someone would invent a jet pack my problems would be solved.