When COVID-19 started I was fine. I was one of the lucky people. Derek and I had jobs we could do from home. I had stocked up on toilet paper and kitty litter so all the humans and cats could use the bathroom. I had bought a few extra boxes of spaghetti and jars of peanut butter so I knew even if we got sick of peanut butter sandwiches and spaghetti dinners we could eat. I figured the 2-3 weeks of quarantine would be OK.
The first week we were off school the school district decided the teachers needed a week to plan. I knew I wanted to keep my kids in the academic mode so I started figuring out what to teach them. I scoured the internet and found worksheets. There were so many worksheets available. I printed out vocabulary, time, and math worksheets. Then I found cursive worksheets. Perfect! I hear that school doesn't teach kids how to write in cursive. This will be a great two week project. I'll teach them cursive. I'm winning at this parenting thing. I found a website to practice spelling. Then I found a math website running a contest with super-creative math problems. Then I remembered GoNoodle.com for movement (P.E. -- check!). I found a great YouTube station for learning rhythms (music -- check!). Facebook became rife with posts by parents advertising Mo Willem's daily lunchtime doodle vlog (art -- check!) and the Cincinnati Zoo live feed (science - check!). I even found a video explaining the national census to kids (social studies -- check!) I was winning at parenting AND homeschooling. I was up until midnight every night looking for things to do and planning activities while still taking care of kids, working, prepping three meals and two snacks a day and fending off a killer virus. Sure...this seemed doable for a few weeks.
The following week we got some resources for the kids from the school. They would send us some websites to check out and apps that were good. Yes, I will take that subscription to EPIC books. That's awesome. Oh, and the typing app is great, too. Please send me the code. But the other things you're recommending??? -- no thanks. No, I won't set up an art project involving paint. I really don't have time to clean up that mess between loads of laundry. Ummmm...I'm not going to set up a mini golf course in my backyard, P.E. teacher. It's 40 degrees outside, I don't have six cardboard tubes from paper towel rolls and I have to answer about 100 emails. And while I appreciate the idea, I'm not going to create a number wheel out of tools MacGyver would use and practice my 10 frames because I have to go out to the store today in my mask made out of an old sock to buy some fruit so my kids don't get scurvy after living on boxed mac 'n cheese for the last week!
Then, if I remember correctly, (and who does because I was spending my time arguing with "friends" on Facebook that neither Bill Gates nor Dr. Fauci created the Coronavirus and despite the fact that one lady on YouTube with no medical training has 10,000 followers she did NOT come up with a cure for the virus) online school changed again. We got a new app and now the work was required...or was it? No one knows. Both kids hated it. One kid did it and hated it. One kid couldn't figure out how to work the app and hated it. I tried working the app. I also couldn't figure out the &*#!-ing app and I hated it. What the hell button do I push? How do I record a *&$#@-ing response? I don't know!!!! Grrrrrrr. I spoke with one teacher and told her my kid thought the work was boring. (I had heard the material couldn't be new because not every kid could access the information and it's not fair to teach new material if not everyone can access it.) I was told he should try but he doesn't have to do everything. It's not mandatory. I spoke with my other kid's teacher who said "Your child should be doing the work independently." I wanted to lash out and yell, "Oh really? Well, that's a nice thought but it ain't happening. Have you seen an 8 year old work this app? It's complicated!!! I'm 44 and can't figure it out!!!!!!!" But I was respectful. I asked if the work was mandatory because he was doing fine when I created the curriculum and I was giving him spelling, music, math, science and more. I was told "It is mandatory."
WTF?!?!?! Why am I getting two different answers?
Then a miraculous thing happened. Both kids figured out the app. They were waking up early, running to their iPads and finishing their work quickly. Somehow life got simpler which was good because now I had to prepare for murder hornets coming and I didn't have time to help my kids create a rectangular pyramid out of marshmallows and toothpicks.
Meanwhile Facebook memes keep telling me that I should appreciate teachers more now that I've had a taste of working as one. Maybe I'm just lashing out but those "funny" memes really make me mad. Yes, teachers should be appreciated...but don't think for one second that what parents are doing is anything like what teachers do. We are working with our own kids (and we all know how kids respond to their parents and teachers is completely different), we are juggling jobs and home life in addition to school, and our kids are not in a typical learning environment. Our children miss their friends, activities and daily routines. You can tell me I'm being overly sensitive, but it's not really funny to see memes laughing at parents drowning in their attempts to be teachers.
Next week it will change again. Instead of three Zoom school calls a week for each kid they will have five each. I need to be careful what I wish for. I wished for actual teaching to happen and I got it -- but it means more arguing with my kids that they need to stop playing and go to school -- or, ummm, log into (?) school. Each day the struggles to get my kids to complete their work seem to get a little longer. Today school took over four hours for one of them and included yelling and crying over a scarf dance. We might get snow in May, cicadas are coming back soon to take over Virginia, and just to play safe (since I recently watched Jumanji) I'm not going to play any more board games for a while. I don't know what I would unleash if I played a game of Mousetrap with my kids.
It was not a good day. I'm stressed. I'm frustrated. I'm upset. Tomorrow might be better. It might be worse. No one knows what each day will bring. This is the lot of a parent in 2020 right now. Let's just say that out of my two human kids and two fur kids my favorite right now is probably the one who pooped on the floor.
I try to remind myself I'm one of the lucky ones. I have a home with cabinets filled with food. I have a car that works so I can go to the grocery store without riding on a bus. I have enough money in the bank that I'm not on the verge of losing my house. I have a yard for my kids to run in and burn off some energy.
I'm healthy.
I'm safe.
I'm tired.
After going through surrogacy and having twins, this is the story of my life after fulfilling my dream to become a father.
